


Not Bad At All

by aducklingmuggingyou



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Bella and Hermione are secretly dating, Bella is a tiny bit insecure, Bellamione - Freeform, F/F, Fluff and Humor, Light Swearing, Oneshot, a lot of jobs that Draco is jealous of, bella burned down some houses, draco is scared for life, hermione has a lot of jobs, narcissa is amazing, prompt from bellamione incorrect quotes that I saw on tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:28:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24888370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aducklingmuggingyou/pseuds/aducklingmuggingyou
Summary: “Maybe she’s a bad kisser.”Bellatrix laughed out loud, her signature smirk coming back to play at her lips. “No, she’s good at that too.”-OR-Draco and Narcissa find out about Bellatrix and Hermione’s secret relationship through Draco’s anger at the Daily Prophet!
Relationships: Bellatrix Black Lestrange & Narcissa Black Malfoy, Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter (mentioned), Hermione Granger/Bellatrix Black Lestrange
Comments: 13
Kudos: 288





	Not Bad At All

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt....
> 
> “Draco: Granger can't be good at everything!  
> Narcissa: Maybe she's a bad kisser.  
> Bellatrix: No, she's good at that too.  
> Draco and Narcissa: What?  
> Bellatrix: What?“
> 
> Hi everyone!! I hope you all are amazing!! I wrote this in like 40 minutes in between texts about the Hamilton Disney+ movie and Sierra Boggess with my friends, so it’s probably not the best. Plus, my brain is totally fried from the past two days lol. I hope you enjoy it though!!<33

“What’s wrong, dear?” Narcissa asked gently, seeing her son throw something onto the kitchen table. She frowned when she realized that it was the newspaper. “Oh come now, the news can not be that terrible. Did the Minister do something?”

Draco Malfoy growled in rage, his pale face turning the color of a cherry. “Barnabas Cuffe asked Granger to write another article for the Prophet.”

“Oh, I know Barnabas. He and I used to date when we were at Hogwarts,” Bellatrix added from her seat at the island, speaking over the rim of her mug. Her pitched voice came out a bit muffled, but Draco and Narcissa could hear the smirk in her tone. “He got boring after the first minute.”

“Bella!” Narcissa gasped.

“What?” Bellatrix exclaimed, annoyed for being scolded by her baby sister. “Not in a bad way, Cissy! He just went on and on about every type of essay there was. Broke up with him on our first date.”

Narcissa sighed and shook her head, a few pieces of silky blonde hair falling from the clip they were being held up with. “And how, may I ask, did you end up with Barnabas?”

“It was a dare.”

“Ah.”

Draco ran a hand through his hair and slammed his hands on the table, quickly getting the attention of his mother and aunt. “I’m being serious!”

“Of course you are, honey,” Narcissa patted him on the head as she passed the table on her way to get an apple for breakfast. She was still wearing her nightgown, it was so early.

“Mother!” Draco argued loudly, hating that he was still being treated like a small child. He was twenty-two for Merlin’s sake. Well out of Hogwarts and still getting patted on the head by his nightgown-clad mother like he was five. Draco could even hear Aunt Bellatrix snort out a laugh when he yelled. “I’m not joking around here. It is not fair that Hermione is being treated like a pretty princess and getting all of these opportunities. The Prophet? Writing for the West End? Training to be an Auror and having a job as Minister’s assistant? I am just as good a writer as her, and Granger can’t be good at everything she does!”

Narcissa furrowed her brow. She hadn’t known that Hermione was working just under the Minister of Magic. Interesting, but she wasn’t very surprised. Though she loved her son dearly, Narcissa knew that Draco was not nearly as good a writer as his boyfriend’s best friend. But still, she didn't want to anger Draco even more. So, instead of saying what she thought, Narcissa added, “Maybe she’s a bad kisser.”

From next to her sister, Bellatrix laughed out loud, her signature smirk coming back to play at her lips. “No, she’s good at that too.”

Draco and Narcissa both looked up at the brunette, their whole bodies conveying their confusion and utter shock. “What?” They asked at the same time. It was the only question either of their mouths could form at the moment, and they had so many.

“Hmm?” Bellatrix raised her eyebrows in mock innocence, taking a sip from her glass. Seeing their confused expression, Bella asked again, “What?”

“You. . .  _ what?”  _ Draco pointed at his aunt, and then at the Prophet, and then back at Bellatrix. He couldn’t comprehend the prospect of what Bellatrix was implying, and Draco was slightly worried that his brain might explode if he thought about it much more.

“Bellatrix, stop making that face.” Narcissa said slowly, watching her sister very carefully. She had a distinct feeling that Bella was not bluffing, and, if Narcissa was being completely honest, it scared her. “Don’t say anything, you know what you are doing.”

Bellatrix smirked again, leaning back on the bar stool she was sitting on. She knew Hermione would kill her for this later, but Bella just couldn’t help herself. “Do I?”

Draco suddenly stood up, his face going from tomato red to olive green in a matter of seconds. “Excuse me for a moment, I just have to vomit.” With that, he ran out of the room as fast as his legs could carry him. After he threw up enough, Draco was going to write to Harry about this. He needed answers, and he certainly wasn’t going to ask Aunt Bellatrix or Hermione herself.

“Bella?” Narcissa raised an eyebrow at her older sister. “What are you talking about?”

“What? Oh, with Granger?”

Narcissa rolled her eyes and went to sit next to Bellatrix. Her hand came to rest over her sister’s and when Narcissa squeezed, Bellatrix smiled a bit. “Yes with Hermione. You can tell me.”

“It’s nothing special, Cissy,” Bellatrix shook her head dismissively, though the spark in her dark eyes told a different story. “We saw each other about two months ago while I was at the Hogwarts helping clean up the buildings I burned and shit like that. She was there on Ministry business I think. Anyway, she saw me and thought that she should help. Of course, she still hated me then, and I hated her, but. . .”

“When you tortured her?”

Bella nodded, a faint blush rising in her sunken cheeks. “Yeah. I guess there was always a spark or something between us, no matter how twisted it was or how terrible the situation. While we worked, we talked and talked. We spoke so much that we had to extend it to dinner as well. And then the spark kind of hit us, and we both started screaming at each other and throwing things. We got kicked out of that restaurant pretty quickly after that,” Bellatrix laughed at the memory. “Anyways, then the cold got to us, and, because I didn’t bring a jacket, we had to kind of share one.”

“Aww,” Narcissa smiled gently as she pictured that scene taking place.

“Shut up, Cissy.”

“Never.”

Bellatrix groaned and rolled her eyes, covering her face with her hands for a moment. After shaking her head for a solid thirty seconds or so. Bellatrix continued. “Mhmm. So then, because it was so late and both of us were too tired to apparate, we got a hotel room in town.”

Narcissa gasped and covered her mouth, mostly trying to mask her huge smile. “Bella you didn’t! Did you?”

“No!” Bellatrix shook her head again vigorously, a frown stuck firmly to her features. It was such a stark contrast to her usual manic grin, that it worried Narcissa just a little. That being said, most things Bellatrix did scared her. “No, we didn’t.”

“Then when did you learn that she’s such a good kisser, huh?” The blonde nudged her sister playfully, a smile tugging at both of their lips now.

Bellatrix’s blush deepened when she answered. “A month after that.”

“Awww!” Narcissa said again, which earned a hard kick in the shins from Bellatrix. “Seriously Bella, I like that you are branching out and trusting people again. And apologizing.”

“Shut up!”

“I’m not kidding.”

”Ugh. Whatever, Cissy.”

There was a long pause where Narcissa got up to get some more tea and Bella thought over what her younger sister had said. “You really are proud?” Bellatrix inquired after a while, looking up at her sister.

Narcissa turned back around to face her sister, smiling brightly. “Of course! Why wouldn’t I be?”

She shrugged. “I dunno. Maybe because it’s Hermione.”

“I’ve never held anything against Hermione, dear sister. I actually like her very much,” Narcissa commented truthfully. “I do have one big concern though.”

“Oh no,” Bellatrix’s heart sunk like a stone, dropping almost immediately into the pit of her stomach. “And what might that be, Cissy?” Her voice shook ever so slightly.

“How are you going to explain this to Draco?”

Bellatrix’s worries settled into nothingness with ease, and her signature manic smile cake creeping back to her features. She leaned back in her chair again when she answered, “We could always kill him.”

“Bella!”

“Kidding!”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked this quick Bellamione oneshot! I’m still working on the Thunder fic, but, like I said, writers block and brain frying. Sorry! Stay safe lovelies!!<333


End file.
